When someone tells you they have depression or anxiety

When someone tells you they have depression or anxiety, do not judge him or her -- help them.


Depression -- it is a very touchy topic. People hear “depression” or “anxiety” and some think that it can be contagious, or others just say “You need to lighten up.” I have actually had people say “Oh stop being so sad, cheer up!” What they don’t know is, it is not as simple as just saying, “Okay I will be happy.” Depression is not contagious, and neither is anxiety. Some people are born with it, some people have had a traumatic event that fed into the depression or anxiety and I some cases, it can be genetic.

Depression, as defined on dictionary.com, is “feelings of sever despondency and dejection.” This definition makes no sense. It can be defined in simpler terms, such as not wanting to do anything like eat or go outside. On the other hand, anxiety is defined as “a feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease, typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome.” In other words, depression is when you are happy one moment and out of no where you feel upset and want to go home. When a person has depression, they either sit in front of a TV all day only to move to eat or go to the bathroom. Others sleep their life away. Depression is also when someone asks you to hang out and you just say “No, I am busy,” but in actuality you are at home trying to get your mind off of horrible thoughts. That’s part of the depression package -- feelings of despair and self-hate.

What people don’t know is when you say “just cheer up,” it is a lot harder than you think to “cheer up.” It's involuntary, you can’t control your feelings with depression, unless you are put on a smorgasbord of medications, and sometimes that doesn’t even help.

Anxiety on the other hand is completely different. Anxiety is when you can’t talk because you are shaking so badly, when you have heart palpations and when you can't sit still because you fear something horrible is going to happen, such as a roof collapsing on you, or when you are in a car and you are afraid that someone is going to side-swipe you. With anxiety, you worry too much and with depression, you don’t worry enough. Anxiety causes you to not sleep at all because so much is on your mind; depression causes you to sleep all day. Having both of them is a horrible combination because your mind cannot really make itself up. You are limited to the things you can do because your illness takes over your mind. It is almost like having a dark shadow creep over your brain, and just before it takes you over completely there is a lighting strike of worry and discomfort and then it is a battle in your mind. When someone tells you they have depression or anxiety, do not judge him or her -- help them.

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